Books for a Child Who Gets Teased for What They Love

9 min read

When a child gets laughed at for the thing they love, the books that help are the ones where a character goes through exactly that and keeps loving it anyway. If it’s a hobby other kids call weird, start with The Bug Girl by Sophia Spencer. If it’s dancing, Oliver Button Is a Sissy or Ballerino Nate. If it’s making things, Made by Raffi. And if somebody told them they can’t have the part, Amazing Grace. All eight picks below are other authors’ books, and I’ve said what actually happens in each so you can judge the fit.

I write the Kitty and Dino books for my own son, and one of them exists because this happened to him. That story comes after the list, along with the book it turned into. It’s ours, so it’s labeled.

Picture books for a child teased for what they love

The quiet version is the one to watch for. Sophia Spencer, the real girl behind The Bug Girl, didn’t make a fuss when kids bullied her. She just stopped talking about bugs. If your kid has gone suddenly quiet about their favorite thing, that might be why.

If it’s bugs, or any hobby other kids call weird

The Bug Girl: A True Story, by Sophia Spencer with Margaret McNamara, illustrated by Kerascoët. Sophia loved bugs from the day a butterfly landed on her shoulder, when she was two and a half. In preschool and kindergarten she shared everything she knew about grasshoppers. Some kids bullied her for it, and she went silent on the subject. Then her mom wrote to an entomological society asking for a bug scientist pen pal, and hundreds of scientists wrote back under the hashtag #BugsR4Girls. It’s all true, which gives it a weight the made-up stories can’t quite match.

If it’s dancing

Oliver Button Is a Sissy, by Tomie dePaola (1979). Oliver would rather read, draw, dress up, and dance than play the games the other boys expect. The boys write “Oliver Button is a sissy” on the school wall. He enters a talent show anyway, and he doesn’t win. The next morning someone has crossed out “sissy” and written “star.” A heads-up: the title uses the bullies’ word, so you may want to read it yourself first.

Ballerino Nate, by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley, illustrated by R.W. Alley. After seeing a ballet, Nate wants lessons. His big brother Ben tells him only girls can be ballerinas, and even with his parents saying otherwise, it worries him. He’s the only boy in class. Then he meets a male dancer from a professional company, and that settles it. This one’s gentler, since the teasing comes from a sibling, so it suits a younger kid.

If it’s making things

Made by Raffi, by Craig Pomranz, illustrated by Margaret Chamberlain. Raffi is a quiet boy who doesn’t like noisy games. His teacher shows him how to knit, and the other kids decide knitting is girly. He asks his parents if he’s weird. They tell him he’s wonderful. When the school pageant has no cape for the prince, Raffi makes one, and suddenly everyone wants him to make things for them.

Rosie Revere, Engineer, by Andrea Beaty, illustrated by David Roberts. Rosie builds contraptions out of junk, then hides every one of them after her uncle laughs at the cheese hat she made him. Worth knowing going in: the person laughing here is a grown-up in her own family. Her great-great-aunt Rose is the one who turns it around, after Rosie’s flying machine crashes, by telling her a first flop is something to celebrate.

If someone said they can’t have the part

Amazing Grace, by Mary Hoffman, illustrated by Caroline Binch. Grace acts out every story she hears and wants to play Peter Pan in the class play. One classmate says she can’t because she’s a girl. Another says she can’t because she’s Black. Her Nana takes her to the ballet, where the lead dancer is a Black girl, and at tryouts the whole class votes for Grace.

If it’s their lunch or their name

Spaghetti in a Hot Dog Bun, by Maria Dismondy. Lucy’s favorite lunch is spaghetti in a hot dog bun, and a boy named Ralph teases her about it (and her hair). Her grandpa, Papa Gino, tells her everyone has a heart with feelings. When Ralph gets stuck at the top of the monkey bars, Lucy helps him down. That ending asks a lot of a kid who’s still smarting, so I’d save it for once the sting has faded.

Chrysanthemum, by Kevin Henkes (1991). Chrysanthemum loves her name until Jo, Rita, and Victoria make fun of it at school. Then the music teacher, Mrs. Twinkle, turns out to have a long flower name of her own, Delphinium, and says Chrysanthemum is absolutely perfect.

What do you do when your child comes home teased?

I can only tell you what happened in our house.

When my son was little, his favorite thing in the world was a toy kitchen. He cooked all day. Dishes that don’t exist in any cookbook, handed over for us to eat, and we pretended to eat every single one. At that age he wanted to be a chef.

So he told the boys in his class. Some of them teased him for it. Cooking is a woman’s job, they said, and men don’t do it. He came home and told us, and he was hurt.

What I wanted him to hear was simple. Everyone should get to do what they love, in their own way, and it doesn’t matter who says it isn’t for them. I wanted that to reach him gently, so I put it in a story.

He’s moved on since. Firefighter came next, and now it’s animal doctor. The plans change every year or so. The thing I wanted him to know doesn’t.

One more idea, from a different morning entirely. When my son is pushing back on something, the most useful thing I’ve found is to work out what the feeling is and name it for him, before trying to fix anything. Kids often don’t understand what they’re feeling, only that they feel it. Putting it into words for them has helped more than advice ever did, at least with mine.

Harvey the Hippo, the book that came out of it

This one’s ours, so weigh the recommendation accordingly.

Harvey has always wanted to be a ballet dancer. He tries to stand on one leg in the meadow and keeps falling down with a loud thump. He’s sure he’s too big and clumsy for the beautiful moves. Kitty softens the ground under him and Dino grows vines for him to hold, which helps, a bit. “But real dancers don’t need vines,” Harvey says.

That night Kitty and Dino work out their mistake: they’ve been trying to make Harvey dance like everyone else. So they make him a pool, grow water lilies in it, and cool patches for sliding, and Harvey builds his own hippo ballet in the water. When he finally performs, the whole forest comes to watch, and an old turtle calls it the best dance they’ve ever seen.

One honest note, because a parent who owns the book will spot it. Nobody teases Harvey in the story. The doubt is all his own. That makes it a better fit for a few days after the teasing, once the other kids have moved on and what’s left is the little voice saying maybe they were right.

See what the book is about, or get it on Amazon. Kindle Unlimited members can read it at no extra cost.

If your child is more on the outside of a group than teased for one thing, our list of books for a shy child who struggles to make friends is closer. And for a child who’s just starting to notice they’re different from the kids around them, try our books about being different.

If mornings before school have got harder since the teasing, our list of picture books for a child who doesn’t want to go to school is sorted by the reason behind it.

Is it teasing or bullying?

I’m a dad who writes picture books, so I won’t pretend to draw that line for you. Two things I’d watch: whether it keeps happening, and whether your child starts not wanting to go to school. Either one is worth a word with the teacher. A book is for the evening after that conversation. It doesn’t stand in for it.

Common questions

What is a good picture book for a child teased for liking something different?

The Bug Girl by Sophia Spencer and Margaret McNamara, because it’s a true story about a girl bullied for loving bugs who got hundreds of scientists on her side. If the teasing is about a name, try Chrysanthemum by Kevin Henkes.

Are there picture books about boys who like to dance?

Yes. Oliver Button Is a Sissy by Tomie dePaola and Ballerino Nate by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley are the two classics. Ours is Harvey the Hippo, about a hippo who wants to do ballet and finds a way that suits a hippo.

What story should I read to a child who is being teased at school?

Pick one where the character keeps the thing they love, since that’s the choice your child is quietly weighing. Amazing Grace and Made by Raffi both do this well. If the teasing keeps happening, talk to the teacher as well as reading.

What age are these books for?

All eight are picture books, roughly for ages 4 to 8. Ballerino Nate is usually listed for preschool through second grade. For a younger child, read the others yourself first; Oliver Button Is a Sissy in particular uses the bullies’ word in its title.